Sometimes when I am having trouble finding my words I look to what I would say to my nephew.  As I sat in my own struggle with how to proceed with this blog, this is what came to me.  These are my words to him to be read when he is old enough to understand them...

My precious little man. I promised myself that every time something major happened in our world or in your life I would write about it for you.  Like a time capsule of things you were too small to remember.  But these last few months have been unspeakable.  I have not been able to put any of it into words.  But it is my obligation and duty to do this so that someday you can read these words and know what was going on around you as you grew and studied and became part of this world. 

These words are probably more important than any birthday timestamp or milestone mention.  They are the very words of our precious and fragile democracy and the freedom you were born to, the freedom that has withstood time and turmoil but now under threat.  They are words written as the very fiber of our country unravels before us, as we the people allow and disavow the dismantling of what once was the most powerful nation on earth, respected, in a once unshakeable union with the greatest of global countries now crumbling before us, a deep uncertainty for all of us as your young blind eyes turn blissfully unaware to games and toys and the joys of childhood. 

What do I say to you in these dark hours my sweet boy?  I do not know.  It is why I have waited so long to say anything, to put words to paper.  Because it is necessary not just to chronicle history for you, a history I hope you can someday read in the books you love so much, but to speak of the importance of being part of the resistance, part of what will hopefully turn the tide to rebuild our democracy into something truly unflappable, solid, secure.  A place for you to live with all the freedom and acceptance of what this country was intended to be.  A place for everyone no matter their race or religion, the color of their skin or those they choose to love.  A place for everyone to be who they are fully and wholly without fear or prejudice.  A world where we care for the least among us. Where we embrace and grow from connection to those who are different from us. A place with long days of sunshine and peace.  That is the world we should leave to you.  I fear it will not be. 

But I write this now, in the midst of this trial for us as a nation in the hope that when you read it someday, in the hours of your own growth into adulthood, that you can gather strength from my words for whatever you face before you. 

You, my precious nephew, are brilliant.  You have within you the power to change the world for the better.  Lead always with kindness in your heart and follow it with the actions of your hands.  Surround yourself with people who are better than you, smarter than you, more giving than you, because those people will lift you to better yourself.  Seek ways to enrich the world around you instead of your own bank account.  When others bow their heads to the bullies in the room, stand your ground. Do not be rattled by their evil. Be the voice for those with none. Be the angel to those weaker before you. Offer your hand and your heart freely to those who need it.

The men in power today, history will remember them.  Their words, greed and hatred will be indelibly stained on the blood-soaked pages of our nation’s story.  You will read them hopefully from a safe place cloaked in the freedoms I once had, fragile freedoms that have left us now in these black days upon us. 

My words and my thoughts in this time have become less, not greater.  I need to change that for this world, for you my sweet boy. I need to speak against this for the world I want for you to grow up in.  For the world I want to find peace in leaving you when my own days are at a close. 

I do not know in this moment what the world will look like on the other side.  So right now, I offer you these words.

When you are in darkness, confused and can’t tell what is true, look to the sunlight, toward those who act with love and acceptance in their hearts, toward those who seek to better this world, not to own it.  Look toward the peace makers, the defenders, those fighting for all that is good in this world.  Then be among them.  Stand with them.  Offer your unique talents to the cause.  Be brave. Be courageous. Be kind. 

And if somehow by some miracle, in the long years before us, we have left you instead of darkness and destruction, with light and peace, then I offer you this.  Remember that it was not always so.  Remember those who went before you, who fought for the rights you have, those who stood when others would not. Those who stared into the void and raised their swords and voices to it. Read their words and their history.  Seek to know all you can about the darkness so that you never fall to the complacency that we have.  So that you never wake up one day with your rights and those of the ones you love, stripped away in the night when you weren’t paying attention.  Involve yourself in ensuring the future of that peace you have been blessed with.  And above all, never give in, or give up.  Til your last breath, be the hope even when the world seems hopeless. Stand in your courage when the world around you demands it.